Western Powers

Chunky Monkeys (3-0)
It hasn't been easy but Evan's Monkeys prove that they deserved to be in the Finals last year, despite suffering through a series with half of their top players missing. So far however, they've proven to be the cream of the Western Conference. Led by a healthy Joe Johnson, who is leading the charge with 23 PTS, 4 REB, 6 AST and 2 3PT per game. Jason Terry is also pushing for Sixth Man of the Year and he's been shotting an astonishing 54.9 FG% on his way to 20 PTS and 3.7 3PT a game. Oh wait, Manu Ginobili might take the Sixth Man Award this year, as he's going nutty with 20 PTS, 5 AST/REB and 2 STL/3PT a game.

With a such a solid backcourt, it hasn't hurt the Monkeys to have Gilbert Arenas suffereing from 38.7 FG% and only 22 PTS. Let's not forget about Josh Smith here either, as he's going out and producing 19 PTS, 7 REB, 2.4 STL, and 3.6 BLK a night. Wowza! This team is proving to be balanced and overall, much stronger than last year's excellent contending version.

Buffy (2-1)
Despite the loss of Elton Brand in pre-season, Buffy is still holding on to second place in the early going. With eight players averaging 15 points or more per game, this is a high scoring bunch. Baron Davis is contributing 9 AST and 1.5 STL/3PT a night, Stephon Marbury and Jamal Crawford combine for 32 PTS , 11 AST, 2.5 STL/3PT a game. Antawn Jamison is still nearly a 20-10 player (with 2.3 3PT to boot) and Rashard Lewis is popping 3PTs (3 a game) like nobody's business. Add in Tim Duncan and it's safe to say that losing Elton Brand, while slowing down Buffy, hasn't hobbled them in the least.

Fat Jubas (2-1)
The kings of the West last season, the Jubas were riding high before they got blasted by a rising Monkeys team this past week. Still, they are barely getting the full services of Dwayne Wade back -- despite losing Tracy McGrady for a few games -- so the Jubas should easily be in contention this season. They still have Tony Parker (18 PTS, 6 AST), Andre Igoudala (18 PTS, 6.7 REB, 5 AST, 1.9 STL), Josh Howard (23 PTS, 6 REB), Corey Maggette (20 PTS, 7.5 REB), Leandro Barbosa (20 PTS, 1.7 STL, 2.8 3PT), Al Jefferson (19.5 PTS, 11 REB), and LaMarcus Aldridge (19.5 PTS, 8 REB). Oh, did we already mention Wade and McGrady? Even rookie Yi Jianlian is showing signs of fantasy significance with 1.8 BLKs a game and some improving numbers. The only disappointment so far this season is Jermaine O'Neal's 13 PTs, 7.6 REB, and only 1.6 BLK per game.

Funk Coalition (0-3)
As always, the Funk have more point guards than you can shake a stick at. Raymond Felton, Jameer Nelson, Rafer Alston, Randy Foye, Kyle Lowry, Acie Law, and Sebastian Telfair. The problem is, all of these players have taken a step back -- excepting Jameer Nelson (13.8 PTS, 6.5 AST, 1.2 STL). AST and STL isn't the problem here, PTS and roster depth is. Lebron James is still a monster (29 PTS, 8 REB/AST, 1.8 STL) and Carmelo Anthony and Michael Redd are scoring machines -- albeit slightly less this year, combining for only 38 PTS per game but the end of this roster is ugly. The Big Three and the seven point guards might not be enough this year, so maybe a change is in order?

Sour Snails (0-3)
Hey, at least the Snails aren't in last! They haven't won yet but they've scored more categories than the Phanatics so are out of last place for the first time in their history! Schedule a parade! The Snails are actually looking pretty good. Holdovers Steve Nash and Iverson are combining for 45 PTS, 18 AST, 3 STL, 3.5 3PT a game. While Steven Jackson and Ron Artest are just starting to get into the swing of things and Jason Richardson has been struggling (41.7 FG%, 18 PTS, 2.5 3PT), there's signs of life here with new additions Kelenna Azubuike (17 PTS, 5.5 REB, 1.8 3PT), Damien Wilkins (16.6 PTS, 5.6 REB, 1.6 3PT), and of course, rookie Kevin Durant (37.4 FG%, 19 PTS, 1.3 STL/3PT), who's turning out to be a scoring machine. Hedo Turkoglu has been a nice surprise with 17 PTS, 6 REB, 4 AST, 1.2 STL and 1.8 3PT. Who is this guy?! How the pieces mesh together will be crucial for this team since they should have the players to become respectable at least.

Phanatics (0-3)
An ultra-talented team on paper continues to collapse under the weight of injuries and general mismanagement. Paul Pierce and Richard Jefferson are back to their old selves. David West (19 PTS, 7 REB, 1 STL/BLK), Drew Gooden (14 PTS, 10 REB), Al Harrington (20 PTS, 2.4 3PT), Lamar Odom (14.8 PTS, 8.8 REB), and Marcus Camby (13.5 REB, 1.4 STL, 3.3 BLK) are doing as expected and the roster is stacked top to bottom. What's the problem? Well, for one, Vince Carter has missed five games already and even when he was plaig, he was timid and put up only 17 PTS with 0.5 3PT. The piont guard situation on this team is atrocious. Luke Ridnour is injured, Ear Watson is well, Earl Watson, and Marcus Williams and Mike Conley is injured. This team has the talent to go far but they need a direction and a purpose.

Eastern Bloc

The Poobic Heirs (2-0)
The defending champions are asserting their regular season dominance already. With two wins and 14 categories won, they're clearly the cream of the crop in the early going. Kobe Bryant is averaging 30-7-5 and almost two STLs a game. Yao Ming has been dominating with 24-10 and 2.7 BLKs. Additional firepower has been coming in the form of Kevin Martin (28 PTS, 1.5 3PT). Rasheed Wallace has been impressive with 15-7 and more importantly, 1.5 BLK and STL. With Ricky Davis, Udonis Haslem, Devin Harris and Monta Ellis all contributing, the Heirs are looking very solid. The only guy underperforming is point guard Kirk Hinrich, who has been averaging only 9 PTS, 5.7 AST, and half a 3PT a game.

Squirtle Squad (2-0)
Last year's dominant regular season team, the Squirtles have also jumped out to a 2-0 record. Kevin Garnett hasn't lost a step in Boston and he and Boozer are putting up a combined 48 PTS, 28 REB, 9 AST and 3 STL and 2 BLK a game. Last year's rookie of the year, Brandon Roy has clearly stepped up his game by averaging 20 PTS, 6 AST, and chipping with just over one 3PT a game. Of course, Ray Allen is killing from beyond the arc with 3.5 3PT a game and also a healthy 23 PTS average. Plug in the further emergence of Deron Williams (21 PTS, 10 AST, 1.7 3PT) and this team's core is as strong as ever. If young contributers like Ronnie Brewer, David Lee, Martell Webster, and Andres Nocioni can continue to perform the Squad might not lose for a long time.

Jedi Knights (1-1)
New owner Superlum has wasted no introducing their team to the league. While the team is hardly firing on all cylinders, they have managed to put up 13 points scored, which is just a hair behind the Poobic Heirs. Big men and draft mates Dwight Howard and Emeka Okafor are averaging 34 PTS, 28 REB, and 2 BLK a game. While Chris Bosh has been slow to get going (16 PTS, 6.7 REB, 1.6 BLK), he will soon return to double double status. Filling in the stat sheet for him has been old man Zydrunas Ilgauskas, who's been dumping 17.6 PTS and 13 REB a game. Actually, of biggest concern is the ice cold start by Luol Deng, who is putting up just 14 PTS and 5 REB a game. C'mon Luol! The Jedi will have to find some help in the backcourt though, as Sam Cassell, Steve Francis, Nate Robinson, and Mike Miller have been shooting like they're aiming to miss.

100AcreWoodPoohBears (1-1)
With the most intriguing roster in the league, the Pooh Bears have been always swimming right on the cusp of respectability. The problem is, they don't have enough standout stars. Shawn Marion is certainly a fantasy god (16.4 PTS, 12.9 REB, 2.7 STL, 1 BLK/3PT) but beyond that, it's been a slow start overall. Peja Stojakovic is healthy but streaky (3.1 3PT). Pau Gasol isn't near his normal 20-10 numbers (16-6) and Andre Miller is only putting up 4.7 AST a game (along with 13.8 PTS and 5 REB). Andrei Kirilenko (10.9 PT, 7.1 REB, 6.4 AST, 1.6 STL, 2.1 BLK) has stepped up his all around game though, which is a huge relief for Pooh Bears' management. Ben Gordon, Josh Childress, and Tayshaun Prince need to kick it up a notch. The injury to Mike Bibby is clearly hurting this team. A big bright spot has been the play of forward Chris Wilcox, who's contributing 16 PTS and 9 REB a night.

Human Amoebas (1-1)
Without Amare Stoudemire, the Amoebas lose much of their pizzaz. With only 13 PTS and 5 REB a game (with 1.3 STL/BLK), Amare has been bothered by knee problems this season. Marvin Williams is showing the promise of a #2 overall pick with 17.5 PTS and 6.2 REB but center Ben Wallace has been horrific -- shooting 32.1 FG%, 4.8 REB, and just 1.2 BLK a game. Jason Kidd is flirting with a triple double average (9.5-8.0-10.5) but Jarrett Jack has virtually fallen off the planet. Boobie Gibson has been a stellar pickup aas he continues to drain 2.7 3PT a game on his way to 12.4 PTS and 1.4 STL. Dirk and Zach are doing about as expected (40 PTS, 22 REB, 6 AST combined) but it's clear that Dirk's days as a STL/BLK/3PT machine are over. The only veteran really tearing it up? Rip Hamilton, who is putting up an astounding 6.5 AST to go with 20 PTS and 4.5 REB.

MoRRie's Pogiboys (0-2)
New season, same problems. With two losses to start the season, Alvin's squad isn't exactly off to a terrific start. To be fair, they've faced two Western Conference powerhouses in the process so maybe it's just unfortunate scheduling. The team itself is showing lots of promise. Point guards Chris Paul (18 PTS, 11 AST, 2.9 STL) and Chauncey Billups (17.5 PTS, 6.7 AST, 1.8 STL, 2.2 3PT) are clearly the heart and soul of the team. Rudy Gay, Chris Kaman, and Tyrus Thomas have stepped up this season. Kaman especially is doing an excellent Elton Brand impersonation with 18.8 PTS, 13.5 REB, 1.8 BLK. The additions of John Salmons (20-4-4, 1.8 STL) and rookie Al Horford (8.5 PTS, 10 REB, 1.3 STL/BLK) fill out the roster at the forward spots. The big question is when young big men Darko Milicic, Channing Frye, and Andrew Bynum will step up and contribute. How's Crash Wallace doing by the way? Not too hot, shooting 39.3 FG%, with only 0.3 BLK and 15.8 PTS. The two STLs a game are nice but G Wallace is off to another super slow start, just like the Pogis.