Draft Review

In what could possibly be our last year, or at least the last year before we reset keepers (or evaluate and see what we'd like to do), the draft ended up being full of upside and speculation. We introduce Jimmy (an old Slamnation champion from an earlier incarnation) and say good bye to Ping. Off season trades shook up the league a little but not as much as the previous summer. On the eve before the season kicks off, let's take a look at how each team did in the draft.

(1) 100AcrePoohBears
Another season spent struggling in the Toilet Bowl for J's team -- at least they won it all this time. The good news is that last year's team who picked first vaulted all the way to the top and took the championship. So there's a good chance J's team can do the same based on, um, history. Last year's mid-season trades really shook the Bears up. Mike Bibby to Atlanta, Shawn Marion to Miami, and Pau Gasol to the Lakers. Those probably translate to slight statistical decreases across the board. Bibby will garner more AST but Marion won't have Steve Nash anymore and Gasol has to compete for REB/BLK with Andrew Bynum. Plus, Josh Childress jumped ship for Europe.

Having said all that though, number one overall pick Michael Beasley could be an immediate double-double contributor. Last year's draft pick, Rodney Stuckey, looks ready to increase his numbers and this year's second round draft pick, fellow Piston Amir Johnson, has been elevated to the starting lineup. This team is still intriguing on paper with a good mix of big and small and could easily do better than their 8-12 record and make it out of the Toilet Bowl.

(2) Fobsters
Another Toilet Bowl veteran, Ping's team is loaded with big names but few successes. With new management stepping in, the hope is that a steady hand and a new outlook will give Paul Pierce, Vince Carter, Lamar Odom, and the rest of this stellar cast a chance to get to the playoffs. The off-season definitely helped out Vince Carter, who will probably be a monster now that he's the only real player on the Nets. The Fobsters also own Richard Jefferson, who will be basically the same player in Milwaukee. Marcus Camby is grumbling about being shipped out to the Clippers for pennies, but he'll still put up REB and BLK.

The biggest problem for this team is the same as last year: guards, specifically point guards. Earl Watson, Luke Ridnour, Marcus Williams (now in Golden State), and Mike Conley are all pretty mediocre. Watson might get some big AST numbers, Ridnour should do better than he did in Seattle, and maybe Conley will emerge in his sophmore year, but it's all a bit of maybe's. The draft didn't add a point guard but rookie OJ Mayo will be an excellent all around fantasy player and maybe Darko Milicic will put up 2 BLKs a game in support of Camby. Jimmy will have to make some moves to get his team squared up but he's got quite the mouthwatering supply of talent to do it with.


(3) Funk Coalition
The bottom fell out for the Funk last season. Working with a bunch of point guards, most of them underachieved or simply fell apart. TJ Ford, Randy Foye, Jameer Nelson, and Raymond Felton all did worse than the previous year. Big scorers Carmelo Anthonoy and Michael Redd dipped in the PTS department, and that's pretty much all she wrote for a team that was already jettisioning four categories. The good news is that Ford has been moved to the Pacers and will get a chance to play full time. Randy Foye is finally healthy and ready to contribute, and the team still has Lebron James.

Curiously, GM Jon took Kevin Love in the first round, and he obviously doesn't fit the needs of this squad. Does this portend a shake up? With their second rounder, they picked up Eddie House, who will be a sparkplug off the bench for the defending champs. The question will be if this team has another run in it, or if it's back to the drawing board with the (bad) point guards strategy.

(4) Jedi Knights
New owner Chris had a rough go of it in his first year. It's always tough to inherit a team and he did the best he could but that only amounted to three wins (and one tie) on the season. However, Lum showed that he had the savvy to see his team's weaknesses and moved quickly to address them with his draft by selecting two rookie point guards, Portland's Jerryd Bayless and Seattle's Russell Westbrook. This team was desperately hurting for some AST and guards, and now Sam Cassell and Steve Francis will either be cut or related to the glue factory.

Last year found Al Thornton emerging as a nice surprise alongside the already huge lineup of Chris Bosh, Dwight Howard, Emeka Okafor, Brad Miller, and Zydrunas Ilgauskas. The off season yielded good results for Mike Miller (ready to fire it up in Minnesota), Matt Barnes (now starting for the Suns) and Nate Robinson (now playing in a Suns style offense). What the Jedi Knights really need to unleash the force though, is a return to form by Luol Deng and maybe a move or two to move away from their core strength of big men.


(5) Human Amoebas
The Amoebas finally made a waiver move or two last season and slipped into the playoffs with a 9-11 season. There was a lot of fall off from their previous season as Jarrett Jack and Andrea Bargnani really underachieved. The good news is that Amare Stoudemire became a force next to Shaq and Marvin Williams emerged as a good PTS-REB option. Plus, the decline of Jason Kidd is really only in real life as his fantasy value remains consistent. The big question for Eric-A is how to get his team to perform better all around.

It looks like there's enough talent on-hand to get to the playoffs again, especially if first rounder Derrick Rose can carve out significant minutes and if Quentin Richardson flourishes again under Mike D'Antoni. Last year's second round pick, Spencer Hawes might become a viable big man option but that's a long shot. Another option might be this year's selection, forward Donte Green, but he's possibly trapped behind Ron Artest and Shane Battier in Houston. I guess the key to this team's improvement will be centered around Derrick Rose and his highly anticipated rookie season.

(6) Fat Jubas
A deep team on paper, the Jubas took a step back last season under the weight of hefty injuries. Coming off a 16-4-1 record in 2007, they fell to 11-8-1 due to long term injuries to Dwayne Wade and Jermaine O'Neal. This season, both are healthy but it's Tracy McGrady's turn to start the season dinged up. But it may not matter because this team has talent coming out of its pores. Corey Maggette will be the man in Golden State, Al Jefferson has emerged fully as a force, and Andre Iguodala and LaMarcus Aldridge will probably be better too.

A pair of point guard picks in this year's draft, Rudy Fernandez and Chris Duhon, could both pay big dividends if given time. Rudy was a highlight of the gold medal game and Duhon can run and gun in the Knicks' new up tempo attack. And let's not forget Yi Jianlian, who might be in line for some sophmore improvements. Or, um, maybe not. In any case, look for the Jubas to vault up the standings if two out of three of their big guns can stay healthy.

(7) Chunky Monkeys
The Monkeys found themselves in a similar situation to the Jubas. A stellar 2007 and a run to the Finals followed by a lackluster 2008. Losing Gilbert Arenas for most of the season didn't help matters and the team might have to move on without him this season too. Luckily for Evan, his team is still full of talent. Danny Granger emerged as the new Shawn Marion and is now a top fantasy player, taking a lot of the pressure off. There's a good mix of young and old and fine team balance but it'll be tough without Arenas and Manu Ginobili to start the season.

New center Andray Blatche could be a BLK machine, on a team already armed with Tyson Chandler, Josh Smith, and Andris Biedrins. It wouldn't hurt for the Monkeys to look for some point guard help, especially if Mo Williams can't replicate his outstanding numbers beside Lebron and Co. The sleeper on this team is Charlie Villanueva, who is now the starting PF for the Bucks. Second rounder Paul Millsap is injury insurance only and probably won't see significant time. The Monkeys are still loaded and ready for a return to the Finals and we predict that they'll do signifcantly better than last year if they can find some guards to hold out until Manu and Gilbert come back.

(8) The Poobic Heirs
Oliver's team may have fallen early in the playoffs but that's probably not a sign of their decline. In fact, the one time champs are one of the favorites for the championship this year. The only reason they fell out of contention was because of a hole at center late in the year (Yao Ming and Samuel Dalembert were both hurt), but that situation may have been rectified as GM Oliver might win GM of the Year for drafting Greg Oden last year and then sitting on him. If Oden is as good as advertised defensively, Yao's frailty won't be as big of an issue.

The Heirs have a stellar scoring backcourt in Kobe Bryant, Kevin Martin, Devin Harris, and Monta Ellis (out to start the season). There's a distinct lack of true point guards on the roster, aside from possibly Kirk Hinrich, who will probably be pushed aside by Derrick Rose at some point. That's why first round pick Ramon Sessions might be important. The second pick brought in crowd favorite Chris "The Birdman" Andersen, who probably won't get much play behind Rasheed Wallace and Andrew Bogut but could be useful if either one of them goes down. The Heirs are going to be a much tougher out this year, there's no doubt about it.

(9) MoRRie's Pogiboys
The team that took out The Poobic Heirs had a true Cinderella season. From worst to second place in the East behind the heist of 2007 -- acquiring Chris Paul for Elton Brand, who subsequently got injured. Now that CP3 has emerged as an astounding fantasy force, the Pogiboys have taken their game to another level. Another huge factor in their drastic improvement was the emergence of Rudy Gay as a franchise player, along with the solid play of rookie Al Horford.

Alvin is hoping for more of the same from the young trio and must be delighted that Andrew Bynum is healthy and looking very bulked up. Guard depth is a slight issue with the team, as there isn't much behind Chris Paul or Chauncey Billups. The draft brought in college hero Mario Chalmers, who has an outside chance of playing lots of minutes for a rebuilding Miami squad. Now that first round pick John Salmons has a starting gig, he's likely to put up drool worthy numbers on the Kings, which will really help round out a team that is sneaky deep.

(10) Buffy
How was it possible for Buffy to essentially give away Chris Paul (Elton Brand was injured all season, Stephon Marbury was useless) but still handily win the West? Welcome to a team loaded with impact players at every position. Roger's team can go big or small and they were buoyed by career years by Jose Calderon and Mike Dunleavy. Now that Brand is back, he'll join Tim Duncan, Antawn Jamison, Rashard Lewis, Eddy Curry, and Kenyon Martin (plus Shaquille) on a versatile front line. Hell, Stephon Marbury might even have a decent 2008.

There's a good chance first round pick Marc Gasol could make a quick impact in Memphis but the same can't be said about second rounder Eric Gordon, who will have a hard time getting shooting guard minutes behind Cuttino Mobley and Ricky Davis. There's no reason to believe that Buffy won't be dominant in the regular season again, not with Elton coming back at full strength. The question will be if they can follow their success through to the post-season.

(11) Squirtle Squad
The Squad has won fourteen games in consecutive seasons and have taken the East two years running. However, they've had the unfortunate experience of losing to the champion in both seasons. The big Celtic trade last off-season ended up hurting both Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen's numbers, and the awesome depth that this team once had is dipping a little. At the end of the year, they were using Jeff Foster, Josh Powell, and Rasho Nesterovic on the frontline.

Still, it's not like they're bereft of big men as Garnett, Carlos Boozer, and the awesome David Lee will grab REBs by the bushel. JR Smith is looking to have a breakout year and his shooting will mitigate Ray Allen's declines. As long as Deron Williams and Brandon Roy keep improving, Brian's team won't have much to worry about and first round pick Wilson Chandler is being praised by Mike D'Antoni and praised as similar to Shawn Marion. Look for the Squad to really pull it together and make a big push for that elusive championship.

(12) Sour Snails
As KG said in June, "Anything is possible!" The league thought the Pogiboys had a Cinderella season but that's hardly a fairy tale compared to Trieu's 2008 season. They went from worst in the West (by a long shot), all the way up to second, and then upended powerhouse Buffy and Squirtle Squad on the way to a championship. The Sour Snails had the Midas touch with the waiver wire, firing through a league leading number of transactions, and played all the right notes.

The strange thing is that outside of adding Rookie of the Year Kevin Durant, the roster looked very similar to the year before. The emergence of Hedo Turkoglu as an all around force was huge, as was the return to form by Jason Richardson. With gunners at every position and Steve Nash and Allen Iverson leading the charge, the Snails really hit their stride late and started to blow people off the floor. Who says offense can't win championships?

This year's draft picks, Mickael Pietrus and Brook Lopez, don't seem to fit the team's current makeup but they'll have no problem sitting on the bench and cheering on their more decorated teammates. The Snails don't have any red flags or off-season changes and will be in contention for a repeat.

PERfect

Oh what I would give to have John Hollinger's job. Watch the NBA all day and then apply fun statistical models to everything. As the new season approaches, Hollinger has given a break down for every player and even better, did individual scouting reports on all of them. That's insane! Seriously, like every player has a scouting report.

It revealed great things like how Tony Parker rarely uses his left hand, even on layups. Or how Dirk Nowitzki might be the best shooting big man of all time -- Larry Bird just rolled his eyes. And how Dwayne Wade is a huge gambler on defense. Armed with this information, my (W)NBA career is surely only a few months away.

Seriously, I'd want to these people's jobs: Bill Simmons, John Hollinger, or Steve Sabol. In that order.

Make sure to click on the player cards and check out the Hollinger reports. A few examples: Carmelo Anthony, Deron Williams, and Rajon Rondo. The most fascinating part of the reports is the little line at the bottom that compares the player in question to whom they're most like (at their current age). For example, Andrei Kirilenko is comparable to a young Derrick McKey. Michael Redd is Jerry Stackhouse. Joe Johnson is the second coming of Michael Finley. Plus lots of head scratchers like Shawn Marion is most similar to Chris Mullin?!

In other news, the Celtic's season opener and championship ring ceremony is on October 28th. Clear your social calendars. Also, the special edition DVDs of their season will be available starting then too. The set will feature complete games so everyone can relive their crushing victory over the Lakers. Over and over and over again...

2008 Championships: The Answer

5-4, Sour Snails vs Squirtle Squad
By the power of Greyskull, the Sour Snails have done it! From last to first in one short year. Forget just the biggest regular season turnaround in history, the Snails fine tuned their roster all season long and then had the machine perfectly calibrated for a playoff run. Meanwhile, the Squirtles had been dominating their conference all year and with Deron Williams leading the way, they tore through their side of the post-season. However, as they reached the Finals, they were faced with an unenviable task. All of their front line stars would now be nigh useless against the high flying Snails.

For example, what could the Squirtle's Kevin Garnett, Carlos Boozer, David Lee, Jeff Foster, Rasho Nesterovic, Josh Powell, and Ryan Gomes add to the mix? Good rebounds, low turnovers, and field goal percentages were useless. Only Deron Williams (18 PTS, 10.7 AST, 1.2 STL/3PT), Ray Allen (12.7 PTS, 2.3 3PT), and Brandon Roy (17 PTS, 7 AST, 1.7 3PT, 2.0 STL) were really capable of playing run-and-gun.

Check out the Snails stable of horses. Steve Nash (11 AST), Allen Iverson (31.3 PTS, 6 AST, 3 STL), Jason Richardson (27.3 PTS, 3.7 AST/3PT), Kevin Durant (21.7 PTS, 1.3 STL), Steven Jackson (23 PTS, 1.7 STL, 2.7 3PT), and Hedo Turkoglu (19 PTS, 7.8 AST, 1.3 STL/3PT). Heck, even the mighty Chris Quinn added 12.3 PTS, 6.7 AST, 1 STL, and 1.7 3PT this week. All of this and Ron Artest only played one game during the championship period.

This was going to be like Golden State vs Dallas circa 2007. Last week we predicted that the fight would have to be over PTS or FT%. How did that turn out? Well, the Snails obliterated the Squad in PTS (635-481) but lo and behold, lost in FT% (75.9% - 79.4%). That should have equaled a win for Brian's Squirtles right? Not so fast we say. How about that sneaky category, blocks?

The championship game came down to BLKs and it was here that the Snails unexpectedly had two more than the much bigger Squirtles (14-12 BLK). Incredible. Shouldn't three seven footers (Garnett, Foster, Nesterovic) have been able to get a few BLKs in? Apparently not. With a last minute pickup of James Posey (4 BLK) and the clutch Kevin Durant (3 BLK), the Snails pulled through at the end and squeaked out a victory.

Amazingly, both the Snails and the Squirtles had 100 transactions this year (the next closest was Pogiboys with 50), which goes to prove that activity can equal success! So at the conclusion of an amazing NBA campaign -- with an amazing champion for us -- let's join in and congratulate Trieu and his truly Cinderella-esque season. To the Sour Snails!

Playoffs: Semi-Finals Results

7-2, Squirtle Squad vs MoRRie's Pogiboys
While the final score for this one wasn't that close, the STL and BLK categories were decided by only two points each. The 3PT category was only six off too. With an extra four games played, it looks like the late season injury to the Pogiboy's Chris Kaman might have made a difference. Then again, would he have provided enough help against the formidable Squirtles? After all, when role player Rasho Nesterovic averages 66.7 FG%, 22 PTS, 9.3 REB and 1.7 BLK over three games, that's a deal breaker. Not to mention David Lee , Jeff Foster, and Josh Powell all contributing the equivalent of double-doubles each.

The Pogiboys had Chris Paul and Rudy Gay (22.3 PTS, 7 REB, 1.3 BLK, 1.7 3PT) but not much else as Gerald Wallace and Chauncey Billups submitted sub-par two game weeks. With a thin lineup to start with, the Boys were had a really nice run this season but in the end, fell just a few categories short of an amazing final that would have pitted last year's two worst teams in this year's Finals. Now it looks like the beast of the East is Squirtle Squad and deservedly so.

5-4, Sour Snails vs Buffy
As this prognosticator predicted, the last team Buffy wanted to see was the Sour Snails. See, the Snails don't care about REB-BLK-TO-FG%, they are built to destroy teams in only five categories and they do it so well that they negate almost all of Buffy's strengths. The positively sick front line of Tim Duncan (19.7 PTS, 11 REB), Shaquille O'Neal (10.7 PTS, 12.3 REB), and Nick Collison (15.3 PTS, 14 REB) -- not to mention the return of Elton Brand -- wasn't of any use when the Snails blitzed them in AST-STL-FT%-3PT. Short of cloning Baron Davis multiple times, this was just a bad matchup for Buffy.

The Snails had four 20-point scorers last week (Allen Iverson, Hedo Turkoglu, Jason Richardson, Kevin Durant) and three in the high teens (Ron Artest, Chris Quinn, Steven Nash). I mean, how you gonna compete with Chris Quinn? He's the man! Seriously though. The boy went off for 18.7 PTS, 5.3 REB, 7 AST, and 3.3 3PT in three games. If Steven Jackson could have hit the ocean once in awhile (25.5 FG% in four games), the Snails might even have stolen FG%, that's how well they're playing right now.

What happens in the championship round? Can the Squirtles slow down the Snails (ironically, it's the two slowest animals ever, I'm changing my team name to "sloths" next year)? I'm not sure actually. The category that might make a difference here is either PTS or FT% and the Snails seem to generally do better in both. The Squirtles have no chance in AST-STL-3PT so it's probably coming down to PTS. Can they get enough firepower to blow out a Suns-inspired Snails team? I dunno, especially as Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen are sure to be rested. Am I predicting an amazing last-to-first season from the Sour Snails? Barring a miracle, I think I am!

Toilet Bowl Finals
6-3, Pooh Bears vs Phanatics
As the undercard during an exciting week, the Pooh Bears earned the number one draft choice by neatly dispatching the Phanatics. While the score might not have been close on the scoreboard, it took a few last second steals by Andre Miller to seal the victory. With injured forwards Shawn Marion and Chris Wilcox sucking up lineup slots, the short handed Bears were fortunate to face off against the equally short handed Phanatics (missing Charlie Bell and Drew Gooden). The good news for both teams is that they'll be in a good position to use their high draft picks to vault back into the thick of things.

5-4, Funk Coalition vs Jedi Knights
With the third overall pick on the line, the small ball Funk faced off against the big ball Jedi Knights and ran them off the floor. By easily taking the crucial PTS category, Funk insured a slightly higher pick for themselves in the coming year. Both teams need some serious help so let's hope they make the right move next season.

Round 1 Results: East

Squirtle Squad (14-6) vs Human Amoebas (9-11)
The repeat East champion Squirtle Squad is poised to have great post-season run. While the East seemed to be full of great teams mid-season, by the end, a few squads had faded. Don't count the Squad among them. Suffering from very little injury strife, the Squad has been the model of consistency this year. Deron Williams (19 PTS, 10.5 AST, 1 STL/3PT) has emerged as a fantasy star and along with his front court mate Carlos Boozer (22 PTS, 11 REB, 1.3 STL), have been the cornerstone for this team. Boston teammates Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen have both declined statistically but are still premium players. While JR Smith, Francisco Garcia, Boris Diaw, Ryan Gomes, David Lee, and Rasho Nesterovic don't necessarily get the fans screaming, they ably fill up the box scores. The big question is if sophmore sensation Brandon Roy can get back on the court in time to help the Squad to a championship.

The Amoebas sure are mercurial aren't they? The front line duo of Amare Stoudemire (25 PTS, 9 REB, 2.2 BLK) and Dirk Nowitzki provide a solid foundation for success but this team seems a bit short in every area. Rip Hamilton, Marvin Williams, and Zach Randolph add scoring, but not quite enough to make the Amoebas a scoring powerhouse. Jason Kidd is still an AST master but there's not another player on the roster who dishes even half of what he does. Raja Bell and Boobie Gibson average over two 3PT a game, but half the roster doesn't average any. With the late season injuries to Dirk and Ben Wallace, the Amoebas' hopes were sunk and it's possible that they need a more cohesive game plan for next season.

MoRRie's Pogiboys (12-7-1) vs The Poobic Heirs (12-8)
While it's tough to call this a huge upset with the swell season the Pogiboys are having, it was a huge upset. I mean, the defending champs falling to last year's league doormat? That's huge right? The Pogiboys made short work of the Poobic Heirs, 6-3, and really just outhustled them in all the little categories (AST, STL, BLK, TO, FG%, FT%).

With the MVP season by Chris Paul (22 PTS, 11 AST, 2.7 STL) -- and yes, he should be the MVP -- the Pogiboys bounced into this season with a new outlook on life. Rookie Al Horford contributed nearly a double double and Chris Kaman and Andrew Bynum both broke out. And let's not forget about Rudy Gay, who upped his game to new heights (20 PTS, 6 REB, 1.7 3PT). While Tyrus Thomas, Jason Maxiell, Darko Milicic, Joakim Noah, and Ronny Turiaf all suffer from the erratic syndrome, Chauncey Billups and Gerald Wallace supported Paul in the best ways possible by providing additional scoring, steals, and assists. Add in under the radar contributions by Derek Fisher, Steve Blake, and Louis Williams and the question is: how far can this finely tuned squad go?

We might be thanking our collective stars and garters that the Olympics are in Beijing this summer. Otherwise, Yao Ming might have suited up and Oliver would still be in contention for a repeat. Put it this way. Devin Harris (16 PTS, 7 AST) and Monta Ellis (20-4-4) are now solidly main men in both their camps. Caron Butler and Kevin Martin are top tier options. Kobe Bryant is Kobe Bryant. Forget the fact that Rasheed and especially Kirk Hinrich slipped this season, the Heirs are scary. If they didn't have such a big hole in the front court (Brendan Haywood, Nazr Mohammed, Samuel Dalembert) late in the season, would the Heirs really have gone out so early? Here's a scary thought. Next year, this team gets a healthy Yao back, plus Greg Oden. Yowza.

Toilet Bowl
100AcrePoohBears (8-12) vs Jedi Knights (3-16-1)
The Pooh Bears almost made the playoffs but a three game swoon at the end put them out of the running. That's probably a good thing though, because the Bears might need another big draft. The proud owner of Mike Bibby, Shawn Marion, and Pau Gasol, the Bears had to deal with three in-season mega-trades. In each one, it seemed like they lost out statistically While Andre Miller (17 PTS, 7 AST, 1.3 STL) is having a quietly stellar season, everyone else on this roster has been playing worse than last year. Ben Gordon, Chris Wilcox, Andrei Kirilenko, Peja Stojakovic, Tayshaun Prince, and Josh Childress all did better last year. Rookie Jeff Green showed promise but that's on the court, not necessarily in the boxscore. Injuries have ravaged them near the end of the season (Marion, Wilcox, Gasol) but they still mustered enough to take out the Jedi Knights.

Well, it's hard to call the Jedi Knights inaugural season a success. On one hand, they stepped into the breach when the previous owner left but on the other hand, their record fell to a league low -- with nine straight losses to close out the season. THe good news is that, well, um, Dwight Howard (21 PTS, 14 REB, 2.3 BLK) is a man child? Other than that, this was definitely a backwards season for everyone else involved. Luol Deng, Mike Miller, and Chris Bosh all regressed a bit. Brad Miller, Zydrunas Ilgauskas, and Emeka Okafor were double double machines and provided some nice complements to Dwight, but the rest of the roster was hit or miss. Grant Hill stayed healthy in the Valley of the Sun but he's hardly a star anymore. The Knights have some big men assets but they have to carefully build a team that can truly take advantage of those strengths.

Round 1 Results: West

Buffy (14-6) vs Fat Jubas (11-8-1)
Buffy waxed the Jubas in their first round playoff matchup, 8-1, and with only four more games played. The only category Buffy lost? Turnovers.

This is who Buffy has on the bench: Stephon Marbury, Kenyon Martin, Rashard Lewis, Elton Brand, and Eddy Curry. At some point in the past, that would have been an All-Star team (sort of). It just goes to show how much team chemistry has meant this year for Buffy. With Baron Davis (22 PTS, 8 AST, 2 STL/3PT) and Jose Calderon (53.0 FG%, 8 AST, 1 3PT) leading the way, Buffy has been able to replace the wasted seasons of Steph and Elton. Antawn Jamison is back to his 20-10 numbers, Mike Dunleavy and Jamal Crawford turned into scoring machines, and Shaq O'Neal is contributing on the boards and on defense. Let's not forget about Tim Duncan either. This is the team to beat right now, even with so many big names manning the injury list and the bench. Imagine if they still had Chris Paul -- traded away for Elton Brand at the end of last year. Wowza!

It's been a rough year for the Fat Jubas. Talented beyond belief, they've been laid low by a combination of long term injuries to Dwayne Wade and Jermaine O'Neal. While Corey Maggette (22-6), Al Jefferson (21, 11, 1.5 BLK), and LaMarcus Aldridge (18, 8, 1.2 BLK) are all having career years, it still hasn't been enough to offset the big time injuries. With Leandro Barbosa, Josh Howard, Tony Parker, and Andre Iguodala staying about even, this team should of had the firepower for a big run into the playoffs but they were just inconsistent all year. The gradual decline of rookies Yi Jianlian and Jamario Moon didn't help matters either. Management had to be disappointed with such a weak season after last year's powerhouse showing (and a promising four game win streak to get into the playoffs).

Sour Snails (11-7-2) vs Chunky Monkeys (11-8-1)
What a difference a year makes hunh? Last year, the Sour Snails were at the bottom of the barrel. They couldn't get their first win for nearly half a season and by the end, their team was in shambles. Enter Kevin Durant, number one draft pick and franchise savior! Okay, fine, the Snails improvement probably didn't just have to do with Durant's numbers (19 PTS, 4 REB, 1 STL/BLK/3PT). Consider him a nice addition to a swingman group that really pushed the Snails into fast forward. Jason Richardson, Ron Artest, Stephen Jackson, and especially Hedo Turkoglu all turned it up a notch and allowed Steve Nash and Allen Iverson to just play their games. With this group, the Snails became a fantasy version of the GS Warriors, tossing up ridiculous amounts of 3PTs and PTS. With an owner dedicated to mining talent (tied for league lead in roster moves), the Snails really turned their franchise around and could easily upend the favorites for a Finals run. They cleaned out the Monkeys in a game that wasn't nearly as close as the 5-4 score indicated.

Even with a huge injury to start the season -- Gilbert Arenas, beloved blogger, never made it onto the court this season -- the Monkeys should have been a force to be reckoned with. After all, they made the Finals last year (with a D-League caliber squad, but still). Well, injuries aside, the Monkeys just haven't been as cohesive as they were last year. Manu Ginobili, Joe Johnson, and Josh Smith have been impressive as usual, while Rajon Rondo, Danny Granger, and Mehmet Okur all had their moments. Mo Williams was no slouch either. With other talent on hand like Tyson Chandler (the new Ben Wallace), Andris Biedrins, Charlie Villanueva, and Troy Murphy, the Monkeys had some depth. The problem for the Monkeys boiled down to not having a superstar on board. Manu and Joe Johnson were both 20-5-5 guys, and Josh Smith is a BLK beast, but nobody could push the team to greater heights and take over a game in the fourth quarter. Where are you Agent Zero?

Toilet Bowl
Phanatics (7-13) vs Funk Coalition (5-15)
The Phanatics, as always, look so damn good on paper. Paul Pierce, Vince Carter, Richard Jefferson, David West, Marcus Camby, and Lamar Odom are all All-Star caliber players. However, none are the top players for their teams. Is that a problem? Maybe. The Phanatics had a decent season considering they lost Nene for most of it and had a giant hole at the guard spots. Earl Watson and Charlie Bell were hardly fantasy worthy most nights, but who else would have fit in there? Luke Ridnour, Marcus Williams, or Mike Conley? As if. Still, Pierce, Carter, Jefferson, and West should be plenty to make a nice run into the Toilet Bowl and perhaps emerge with the top pick. Can GM Shen do something with that pick to put this team into the playoffs next year?

The Funk always rode the thin line between success and failure and after a promising first season, the wheels fell off the speed wagon and the Coalition collapsed. How many fantasy teams could have completely wasted Lebron James' 30-8-8 season? Not many. But when your team is comprised of point guards who all took a step back (except for Rafer Alston), you've got a recipe for disaster. Jameer Nelson and Raymond Felton are clearly light years behind fellow young PGs Chris Paul and Deron Williams. TJ Ford has Jose Calderon on his team. Randy Foye and Sebastian Telfair can't both play big minutes. With big scorers Michael Redd and Carmelo Anthony slowing down this season just a notch in the PTS deparment, the Funk couldn't stay on the good side of the wins column. Nobody else averaged more than 15 points aside from the big three. And that one guy was journeyman Rashad McCants. Time for Funk to retool?

Mid-Season Review: West

Now that fantasy football is over, it's time to turn our (full) attention in the direction of basketball. The NBA has been brilliant this season -- in no small part due to the resurgence of the Celtics. It seems like a transitory year as old stars are winding down a bit and new ones are emerging. How are our fantasy teams doing? Here's the overall stats for each team up to this point in the season and we'll explore brief capsule reviews of each team as we move along the next few days.

First up, the Western Conference. Unlike the NBA, the West is definitely struggling. Only two teams are over 0.500 and those two teams (Chunky Monkeys, Buffy) are the ones suffering from injuries to their biggest stars, Elton Brand and Gilbert Arenas. The West also fields easily the two worst teams in the league, Funk Coalition and Phanatics, who have won one game each. Let's take a look.

Chunky Monkeys (6-3-1)
The Monkeys are reeling from the loss of Gilbert Arenas and have lost two in a row recently. However, with a soft schedule (only 34 PA), they have maintained their top spot in the West. They are second to last in games played and are weak in PTS and REB, a strength for them last year. The Monkeys aren't dominant in STL or BLK like last year either. They are average in most categories -- aside from 3PT where they are top three -- but that's enough to lead the West. Joe Johnson, Mo Williams, and Manu Ginobili are holding it down but Mehmet Okur and Gilbert have been huge disappointments.

Buffy (6-4)
Buffy started off hot at 6-1 but have dropped three in a row. Similar to the Monkeys, Buffy suffers from a dearth of games played (third to last) due to injuries. They are horrible in FT% but are pretty good in PTS, REB, and excellent in 3PT. They are below average in most of the other categories but so far they've obviously been able to win. Tim Duncan and Antawn Jamison have been outstanding, as has Mike Dunleavy. But the team is hurting from the on and off exploits of Baron Davis, Stephon Marbury, Jamal Crawford, and Kenyon Martin -- all of whom have missed significant time.

Sour Snails (4-5-1)
After sporting the worst record in the league last year, it's a huge season for the Snails already as they've won 4 games and tied 1. Trieu has definitely been paying attention as he's used the most linieups by far in the league, looking for the pieces that will put him over the top -- they've won three in a row. As a small team, they're excellent in FT%, AST, STL, and 3PT (where they almost double their next nearest challenger). They're also ranked top three in PTS. They're horrible in the big man categories but that's to be expected. With Allen Iverson and Steve Nash leading the way, as well as solid contributions from Ron Artest, Jason Richardson, an off the chaini Hedo Turkoglu, and rookie of the year Kevin Durant, the Snails are no longer in the slow lane.

Fat Jubas (4-5-1)
Last year's reigning West regular season champion, the Jubas are experiencing an up and down season despite an eye-poppingly talented roster. They're shooting horrifically (9th in FG% and FT%) but scoring tons of PTS, good enough to lead the league. They are however, very middle of the pack in REB, AST, and BLK. Andre Igoudala, Josh Howard, Corey Maggette, and Al Jefferson are great so far and the team still boasts Tony Parker and Leandro Barbosa -- along with nice looking rookie Yi Jianlian. But with Dwayne Wade, Tracy McGrady, LaMarcus Aldridge, and Jermaine O'Neal on and off, it's been a bit of a struggle. The Jubas are too deep to stay near 0.500 for long though.

Funk Coalition (1-9)
Choosing to fight in only five categories, the Funk have always been delicate. Last year, they were a respected if vulnerable team. This year, the wheels have fallen off and they're suffering from six losses in a row with no end in sight. They're 4th in PTS/STL/3PT, and only dominant in AST -- along with ranking 6th in FT%. Last year, they were near the top or dominant in PTS/AST/STL/3PT. Michael Redd and Carmelo Anthony aren't 30 point scorers anymore, TJ Ford is out, and the team suffers from a severe lack of depth. Only Leron James has been a bright spot this season (29 PTS, 7-8 REB/AST, 2 STL). GM Yang has built the real life version of the Cavs; a one-man band built only to lose.

Phanatics (1-9)
This team was capable of winning eight games last season but they're in severe trouble this year. With multiple injuries -- as always -- and little manager attention, the Phreaks have played the least games in the league. In addition, they're horrible in AST and STL. Then again, they are very powerful in REB and TO. What they need is to push every other category up to average status and estabalish some true strengths. Paul Pierce, Vince Carter, Lamar Odom, Marcus Camby, Richard Jefferson, and David West should be enough to win more than one game so far.

Mid-Season Review: East

Man, the East is kicking ass. They've got two one loss teams and four teams over five hundred. By the power poll, the third place team in the East (Pogiboys) are better than any team in the West. How you like that for dominance? The Poobic Heirs are milking a four game win strea, the Pogiboys have three going on, and the rest of the conference can compete on most every night. Let's take at what's going on mid-season.

Squirtle Squad (9-1)
The Squad is cruising once again. They aren't dominant in any one category but they are strong in FG% and AST. Actually, the team does suffer from some significant weaknesses, despite their sterling record. They're third to last in FT%, BLK, and 3PT and not great at REB. Then again, they have had Brandon Roy emerge, a mostly healthy season from Jamaal Tinsley, and a great year from Deron Williams. In addition, Carlos Boozer is a maniac. Who else is averaging 23.5 PTS, 11.3 REB, 3 AST, and 1.3 STL? Nobody! The problem is that Boston teammates Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen are producing less than they did last year. Can the Squad fend off Poobic Heirs for the regular season crown?

Poobic Heirs (9-1)
With only one loss -- to Squirtle Squad -- the Heirs are in great position to defend their championship. They are tops in games played but that's not the reason they're winning; they're just very good. They are first in REB, FT%, STL, and BLK. Throw in the fact that they are second in PTS and very few teams will beat them. They are only 7th in FG% and AST (and horrible in TO) but no team can afford to be amazing across the board. Former teammates Kobe Bryant and Caron Butler are tearing apart the competition and Yao Ming, Kevin Martin, Monta Ellis, Udonis Haslem, Rasheed Wallace, and Samuel Dalembert are all great fantasy players. The only weak spot here has been the disappointing play of Kirk Hinrich but he's been picking it up of late.

MoRRie's Pogiboys (7-3)
The Pogiboys are the story of the first half of the season as they've gone for seven wins after winning a league low two games all of last year. They are a drastically transformed team with a full season from Chris Paul and his new cave man buddy Chris Kaman. The Pogiboys are no longer devastated by injury and are ranked very high in AST, STL, BLK, and FT%. They still have significant problems putting up PTS and REB but they're certainly very competitive, even handing the Squirtles their lone loss. Chauncey Billups is steady as ever, Rudy Gay has really emerged (and we won't even mention double double machine Kaman here), and Gerald Wallace is healthy and scoring. It's a shame Tyrus Thoomas and Darko Milicic can't really get it together but hey, the Pogiboys have Andrew Bynum and Al Horford to pick up the interior slack.

100AcreWoodPoohBears (5-5)
The Pooh Bears are a nice story themselves. They finished last season with a 38.1% winning percentage but they're playing even so far this season. As always, they can't score (PTS and 3PT are awful) but they shoot accurately and protect the ball. They have excellent FG%, FT%, and are tops in TO. If only they could get their STL and BLK numbers a bit higher, they would be a quite a threat. A full season of Pau Gasol has helped, as well as the return to form of Andrei Kirilenko (6 REB, 5 AST, 1.2 STL, 1.9 BLK). Let's crank up the defense!

Human Amoebas (4-6)
Always an intriguing team, the Amoebas have started off very average so far this season. They are ranked between 5th and 7th in FT%, PTS, AST, TO, and BLK. They are 9th in STL and 3PT with only one strength, REB (4th). They also shoot really poorly -- third to last. Still, this is a team with some serious talent. Dirk Nowitzki, Zach Randolph, Jason Kidd, Amare Stoudemire, and Richard Hamilton are standouts while Marvin Williams, Ben Wallace, and Daniel Gibons are all contributors. However, Raja Bell, Andrea Bargnani, Jarrett Jack, and Quentin Richardson have all turned in craptastic performances so far. What's next for the Amoebas?

Jedi Knights (2-7-1)
Our newest owner, Chris, is suffering from some growing pains. They are almost the exact opposite of the Sour Snails and Funk Coalition. The Knights are strong in REB, BLK, TO, and first in FG%. On the flip side, they're horrible in FT%, PTS, AST, STL, and 3PT. Their best bet to get a few wins is to push at least one of those latter categories up a few notches. Dwight Howard, Chris Bosh, Emeka Okafor, and Zydrunas Ilgauskas have been what you'd expect. However, everyone else aside from Luol Deng and Grant Hill has been somewhat disappointing. The team desperately needs more outside shooting to complement Mike Miller, unless his 3PT are no longer needed at all.